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Courtroom, Judge, male judge in black mirror background

<p>The topic of the week has been Family Court on my Tik Tok. I decided to go more in depth here. You may have heard that the family court system is broken but it is not. The court system was not built with the best interest of children in mind but as a billion dollar industry that continues to bring families back to court again and again while lining the pockets of attorneys and other court professionals and ultimately&nbsp; leaving a devastating trail of traumatized children in its wake. Many of these children are so traumatized that they then give up hope of every having the system help or listen to them.&nbsp; As I spoke of in my last blog that the children are so desperate for attention that they misbehave in school or at home trying to reach out with behavior that says "help me" Many times children are given a GAL which is supposed to represent their own&nbsp; interest but again as a money making industry and the safe parent is put further into financial ruin as punishment for asking that their children's voice be included. There are other court professional such as parent cordinators, mediators, psychologist all receiving financial gain at the cost of the childrens well being.<br></p><p><br></p>

Family Court in this day and age

Graduation hat with glass jar saving money scholarship for education in future on wood table,vintage,minimal.

<p>I came across a post today that got the juices flowing about dealing with a narcissist when it comes to educational rights and your child. Narcissist will show everyone a copy of court orders when it shows what areas that they have power and control in. For example, a narcissist will show the school where they have final decision making but will simply omit the page that shows that they must consult with the other parent to understand their wishes. Teachers and school personnal do not want to be placed in the middle and after a few minutes with the charming and charismatic narcissist will many times ignore any questions regarding minor child(ren) that might be asked by the other parent. I hear time and time again from clients that the narcissist parent will call and throw a tantrum if their child is disciplined in school or given discipline such as suspension or a school resource officer is involved if the behavior is criminal in nature. By the time the staff realise what the abuser is about they have excluded the other parent and it goes from bad to worse all the while the child is stuck in between and no one is helping the child. The minor child sees staff as someone they cannot trust and many gravitate to failing grades, negative behaviors for attention til they are a shell of their previously happy self. <br></p>

Minor Children The Narcissist & School

<h2>Take Time to Heal</h2><p>The first year after a divorce can be challenging. It's important to give yourself time to heal. Allow yourself to feel a range of emotions. This is a normal part of the process. Seek support from friends, family, or a trauma-informed therapist.</p><figure id="figure-13yj2ex17ilwen9fgi" class=""><img id="13yj2ex17ilwen9fgi" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1579291465628-98115e927a42?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwyNHx8aGVhbGluZyUyMHByb2Nlc3N8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzE2MTkwMDc3fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="healing process" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-2xl md:rounded-3xl lg:rounded-4xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1579291465628-98115e927a42?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwyNHx8aGVhbGluZyUyMHByb2Nlc3N8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzE2MTkwMDc3fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><h2>Don't hesitate to reach out to them. They can offer a listening ear or a shoulder to lean on.</h2><h3>Professional Help</h3><p>Consider seeking help from a professional. A trauma-informed therapist or coach can provide valuable insights. They can help you navigate your emotions and set goals for your future.</p><h2>Focus on Self-Care</h2><p>Take care of yourself. This is crucial during this time. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Exercise, eat well, and get enough sleep.</p><figure id="figure-a8ial2zlalwen9i33"><img id="a8ial2zlalwen9i33" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1613184472303-d09b08862533?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw2fHxzZWxmJTIwY2FyZXxlbnwwfHx8fDE3MTYxOTAwODF8MA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="self care" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-2xl md:rounded-3xl lg:rounded-4xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1613184472303-d09b08862533?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw2fHxzZWxmJTIwY2FyZXxlbnwwfHx8fDE3MTYxOTAwODF8MA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><h2>Health</h2><p>Maintaining your physical health is important. Regular exercise can boost your mood and energy levels. Eating a balanced diet can also help you feel better.</p><h3>Mental Health</h3><p>Your mental health is just as important. Practice mindfulness or meditation. These can help reduce stress and improve your overall well-being.</p><h2>Set New Goals</h2><p>Use this time to set new goals for yourself. Think about what you want to achieve in the next year. This could be related to your career, hobbies, or personal growth.</p><h3>Short-Term Goals</h3><p>Start with short-term goals. These can be easier to achieve and can provide a sense of accomplishment. They can also help you stay focused and motivated.</p><h3>Long-Term Goals</h3><p>Consider your long-term goals as well. Where do you see yourself in five years? What steps can you take now to get there? Setting clear goals can help you create a roadmap for your future.</p><figure id="figure-see8hhofzblwen9mbp"><img id="see8hhofzblwen9mbp" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1516389573391-5620a0263801?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwyMnx8Z29hbCUyMHNldHRpbmd8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzE2MTkwMDg2fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="goal setting" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-2xl md:rounded-3xl lg:rounded-4xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1516389573391-5620a0263801?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwyMnx8Z29hbCUyMHNldHRpbmd8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzE2MTkwMDg2fDA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><h3>Career Opportunities</h3><p>Consider new career opportunities. This might be the perfect time to pursue a new career path or further your education. Taking steps to advance your career can be empowering and rewarding.</p><p>Navigating the first year after a divorce is not easy. But with the right support and mindset, you can emerge stronger and more resilient. Take care of yourself, set new goals, and embrace new opportunities. This can be a time of growth and renewal.</p>

Top 10 Tips for Navigating Your First Year After Divorce

Child depressed by quarrel between mother and father

<h2>Understanding the Importance of Communication with a high conflict parent.</h2><p>Effective communication is the cornerstone of successful co-parenting. When both parents are on the same page, it creates a stable and nurturing environment for the children. As a professional divorce coach, I’ve seen how&nbsp; communication with a high conflict co-parent can be difficult and messy.&nbsp; Remember, the goal is to make decisions that are in the best interest of your children.</p><p>When dealing with a a high conflict co-parent it is vital to create healthy boundaries and it is most helpful to use a parenting app such as Our Family Wizard Talkingparents or AppClose to assist with child focused&nbsp; communication, consider setting up regular check-ins with your co-parent through one of these apps. These can be weekly messages where you place your children's schedules, school activities, and any concerns that may arise. Make sure to keep these conversations focused productive and professional.</p><figure id="figure-t47gu7rquhlxquemgh"><img id="t47gu7rquhlxquemgh" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1520881363902-a0ff4e722963?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxjb21tdW5pY2F0aW9uJTIwdGlwc3xlbnwwfHx8fDE3MTkxMDQ0NTR8MA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="communication tips" class="object-cover bg-gray-100" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1520881363902-a0ff4e722963?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxjb21tdW5pY2F0aW9uJTIwdGlwc3xlbnwwfHx8fDE3MTkxMDQ0NTR8MA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><h2>Creating a Consistent Routine</h2><p>Children thrive on routine and consistency, especially during times of change like a divorce. Establishing a predictable schedule helps them feel secure and understand what to expect. When divorcing a high conflict coparent it is typical that a high conflict individual do things such as counterparenting because of this it is important that you provide consistent times for meals, homework, and bedtime. Again in a high conflict divorce you will need to think along the lines of parralel parenting where you can only control what happens on your parenting time. (see the power and control wheel regarding post separation abuse)</p><p>When children know that your home provides consistency it allows them to relax and&nbsp; adapt more easily to the new family dynamics. Children struggle in chaos and inconsistency and many times you will see increased anxiety in your child. It is recommended to have your child see someone if this persists.</p><h3>Tools to Help You Stay Organized</h3><p>Utilize tools like shared calendars or co-parenting apps to keep track of your children's schedules and important dates. These tools can help prevent miscommunications and ensure that both parents are informed about upcoming events and responsibilities.</p><figure id="figure-ak43ch5ppelxquemgh"><img id="ak43ch5ppelxquemgh" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1525107372716-1a85946c5dff?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxmYW1pbHklMjByb3V0aW5lfGVufDB8fHx8MTcxOTEwNDQ1NHww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="family routine" class="object-cover bg-gray-100" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1525107372716-1a85946c5dff?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxmYW1pbHklMjByb3V0aW5lfGVufDB8fHx8MTcxOTEwNDQ1NHww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><h2>Focusing on the Children’s Needs</h2><p>During the post divorce journey, it’s crucial to keep the focus on your children’s needs . After leaving a high conflict relationship it is recommended to speak with a traum-informed therapist to ensure that you give yourself the proper tools to healing.</p><p>Encourage your children to express their feelings and listen to their concerns. Validate their emotions and reassure them that you love them and are committed to their well-being. This emotional support is vital for helping them navigate the changes in their lives.</p><h3>Encouraging Positivity</h3><p>&nbsp;Never speak negative about the other parent in front of the children. Speaking negatively of the other parent tells the child that there must be something wrong with them as they are 50% you and 50% the other parent. When asked by one of my children "Why does dad speak bad about you?" I explained to my child that I could not speak for the other parent the child persisted and said you never speak bad about them and at that moment I seized the opportunity to explained to the child that they are the best of both of us and that they are the best thing that their father and I would ever have accomplished in our lives. The child smiled and never asked again.&nbsp;</p><figure id="figure-meixcjavrlxquemgh"><img id="meixcjavrlxquemgh" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1664990594674-418f27010fee?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxoYXBweSUyMGNoaWxkcmVufGVufDB8fHx8MTcxOTEwNDQ1NHww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="happy children" class="object-cover bg-gray-100" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1664990594674-418f27010fee?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxoYXBweSUyMGNoaWxkcmVufGVufDB8fHx8MTcxOTEwNDQ1NHww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><h2>Seeking Professional Help When Needed</h2><p>Parenting with a high conflict co-parent can be challenging, and it’s okay to seek professional help when needed. A divorce coach or trauma-informed therapist can provide valuable guidance and support. They can help you develop effective parallel parenting strategies and give you communication tips when dealing with an high conflict co-parent.</p><p>Don’t hesitate to reach out for help if you’re struggling. Professional support can make a significant difference in creating a positive experience for both you and your children.</p><h3>Building a Support Network</h3><p>In addition to professional help, build a support network of friends and family who can offer encouragement and advice. Having a strong support system can help you navigate the challenges of co-parenting and ensure that you’re not going through it alone. Ensure that your support system does not disparage the other parent.&nbsp;</p><figure id="figure-asodvo1sd5lxquemgh"><img id="asodvo1sd5lxquemgh" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1511895426328-dc8714191300?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxmYW1pbHklMjBzdXBwb3J0fGVufDB8fHx8MTcxOTEwNDQ1NHww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="family support" class="object-cover bg-gray-100" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1511895426328-dc8714191300?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxfHxmYW1pbHklMjBzdXBwb3J0fGVufDB8fHx8MTcxOTEwNDQ1NHww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><p>By implementing these tips, you can create a stable and nurturing environment for your children, helping them thrive despite the changes in their family structure. Remember, the key to successful parenting is&nbsp; focusing on the well-being of your children.</p>

Co-Parenting in a High Conflict divorce Tips from a Certified High Conflict Divorce Coach

<h2>Understanding Emotional Turmoil During Divorce</h2><p>A High Conflict Divorce is a challenging experience. It often brings a mix of emotions like sadness, anger, and confusion. These feelings can be overwhelming. Many people struggle to find a way through this emotional storm.</p><p>High Conflict Divorce coaching can provide the support you need. A High Conflict Divorce Coach helps you manage your emotions and make clear decisions. They offer practical advice and emotional guidance. This support can make a difficult time more manageable.</p><figure id="figure-tgeoccoagblwpik22p"><img id="tgeoccoagblwpik22p" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1579208570378-8c970854bc23?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw2fHxkaXZvcmNlJTIwc3VwcG9ydHxlbnwwfHx8fDE3MTY4NDczMDN8MA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="divorce support" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-2xl md:rounded-3xl lg:rounded-4xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1579208570378-8c970854bc23?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHw2fHxkaXZvcmNlJTIwc3VwcG9ydHxlbnwwfHx8fDE3MTY4NDczMDN8MA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><p>A coach listens to your concerns and provide a safe space to express your feelings. They help you understand and manage your emotions. This support can reduce stress and anxiety. If needed a coach will recommend a traum-informed therapist and will assist with help you find a good fit for your specific needs.</p><h3>Benefits of Divorce Coaching</h3><p>There are several benefits to working with a High Conflict Divorce Coach. Here are a few:</p><ul><li><strong>Emotional Support:</strong> A coach helps you process your feelings and cope with stress.</li><li><strong>Clarity and Focus:</strong> They help you set clear goals and stay focused on what matters most.</li><li><strong>Practical Advice:</strong> Coaches provide guidance on preparing for legal and financial matters. (emotional and documentation preparation)</li></ul><figure id="figure-8gkcncwcydlwpik4s6"><img id="8gkcncwcydlwpik4s6" src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1604882356818-9100fce260a7?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxOXx8ZW1vdGlvbmFsJTIwc3VwcG9ydHxlbnwwfHx8fDE3MTY4NDczMDd8MA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="emotional support" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-2xl md:rounded-3xl lg:rounded-4xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1604882356818-9100fce260a7?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxOXx8ZW1vdGlvbmFsJTIwc3VwcG9ydHxlbnwwfHx8fDE3MTY4NDczMDd8MA&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><figure id="figure-e486h283sclwpik6rd"><img id="e486h283sclwpik6rd" src="https://images.unsplash.com/1/bag-and-hands.jpg?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxNnx8Y29hY2hpbmclMjBzZXNzaW9ufGVufDB8fHx8MTcxNjg0NzMwOXww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" alt="coaching session" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-2xl md:rounded-3xl lg:rounded-4xl" style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;" data-mce-src="https://images.unsplash.com/1/bag-and-hands.jpg?crop=entropy&amp;cs=tinysrgb&amp;fit=max&amp;fm=jpg&amp;ixid=M3wyNjI5NjF8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxNnx8Y29hY2hpbmclMjBzZXNzaW9ufGVufDB8fHx8MTcxNjg0NzMwOXww&amp;ixlib=rb-4.0.3&amp;q=80&amp;w=1080" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9;"></figure><p>Divorce coaching can be a forward with confidence.</p>

Blog

Family Court in this day and age

Minor Children The Narcissist & School

Top 10 Tips for Navigating Your First Year After Divorce

Co-Parenting in a High Conflict divorce Tips from a Certi...

How Divorce Coaching Can Help You Navigate Emotional Turmoil